June 23-July 7 Including a "Reality Check" Side-Track

So it's been about two weeks now since I posted my last blog - in the "travel log" format. And, I've been thinking, I need to keep doing that for the benefit of those who are following the physical journey I am on right now. I will still take a moment here to acknowledge my hosts over the last few stops:

Brent, Christy and their neighbors and friends in Clifton, Texas

Andy, Lisa and their children in Woodway, Texas

Mother Neff State Park, near Moody, Texas

And Wayne and Ann in Belton, Texas

And Sherry and Miss Kitty and Roger the Bearded Dragon Lizard in Georgetown, Texas:

I am Very Grateful to all of these people who have been so supportive of my efforts thus far. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!

In between, there were more hills, more heat, more long stretches of open roads and landscapes, (and cows and horses), picnic areas and much sought after shady spots, a Really Scary transit of the Waco Lake bridge (sorry, too scary for pictures), and a not so scary transit of a much more welcoming bridge over Belton Lake. In fact, "Bell County" was Very Good to Me! That's where the chip-and-seal stopped and the smooth pavement began and I was Oh, So Grateful for that transition (not to mention my hosts' saltwater swimming pool waiting for me to cool off in as soon as I arrived!)

Now I'm going to shift to My Mission: To Promote Peace and Cool Heads!

During my stops I have been able to keep up with what has been "going on in the world" mostly from the posts I see from my friends on Facebook. And, as it turns out, I have friends from across the political spectrum so I get a pretty broad range of perspectives on most of what is "making the news", from the overthrow of Morsi in Egypt with a combined public and military force, to the fact that Obama just signed a new Executive Order that appears to give the President and the Federal Government the authority to control all communications systems in times of emergency.

And then, there's Adam Kokesh, loading a shot-gun near the Capital Building in Washington, D.C. (And people wonder why the President and all of his men think they might NEED control of all of our communications systems at some point in the future!)

I would offer that there has been no greater time in our history as a country when the call for the voices of Non-Violent resolutions to our problems need to be heard.

People like Adam Kokesh and his ilk have a very myopic view of our revolutionary past. In fact, I am guessing that many people have failed to make the connection between small revolutionary movements that were successful in their day because they had the Support of Other Powerful militaries. For instance, the American Revolutionary War was won in part because of the support we received From the French, who were a Powerful Military in their own right and had grudges of their own against the British. This is something I've learned from reading Paul K. Chappell's book, The Art of Waging Peace.

So who's backing the revolutionaries or potential revolutionaries in THIS country? Or "might" back them at some point in the future? Even if there are Al-Qaeda based supporters (who, of course, would also love to see this country decline into civil war), even THEY are Not That Powerful! They can do a lot of damage, but they could never win a "war" with the U.S.

Folks, we are NOT living in the days of our Forefathers! Has anyone noticed that, for the most part, there are no major conflicts in Europe anymore. Yes, there's some angst over who owes whom what, but nobody's in the business of massing armies against one another. Frankly, the Germans are too busy building solar panels!

And as far as the shift of power in Egypt and what brought millions of people into the streets: No Electricity! And yes, deprive the people of this country of their Oh, So Precious electricity for long-enough and we would all be in the streets as well - but do you really think that is going to happen here any time soon?

My point is some people, like Adam Kokesh, might be looking for "history to repeat itself" and for there to be a "Final American Revolution" here, but there are so many other factors involved in this day and age that, practically speaking, history CANNOT "repeat itself". And if anything, we'd just be doing the same WRONG, VIOLENT thing over again and expecting Different Results then what we have already ended up with now, over 200 years from the "Original American Revolution". If That revolution was So Great, then how have we still managed to end up, presumably, right back where we started from? Think about that.

Something else I learned from reading Paul K. Chappell's books: When two countries "face off" against one another, unlike animals in the wild, there is Nowhere to Run once the "warning aggression" or "posturing" starts. Most animals of the same species, in the wild, will figure out "Who's the Boss" simply through warning aggression and then the one who realizes it is "Not the Boss" runs away. But you get people confined within bordered countries or territories and once the "posturing", once the "warning aggression" starts, there is nowhere to run-away from it. In this case, it is like two lions in a cage and warning aggression almost always leads to direct and violent confrontation.

Consequently, anyone who is currently threatening our government with violence is POSTURING! And the fact that we are seeing more and more reports of police shootings and use of extreme force in situations that do not seem to call for it, and when we see the President(s), signing executive orders that give them more power "in cases of emergency", that is "posturing" as well. And there is a very good chance all of this "posturing" will escalate if those who are wiser do not step up and make clear what the potentially devastating consequences could be.

Again, We Are Not Living In the Time of Our Forefathers! The present may look similar to what it looked like in the past, but it is Not exactly the same. We have Other Means at our disposal, other ways that we can approach our conflicts and resolve our problems and communicate more effectively with one another and We Need to Take Full Advantage of Those. And, as I have been doing through this whole journey thus far, I would HIGHLY, HIGHLY recommend to Everyone, if you have not gotten a copy of Paul K. Chappell's book, The Art of Waging Peace", then Please, for the sake of this country and your loved ones, Buy a Copy and Read It. And then stand up to anyone you may know that thinks the only way we can resolve our current problems in this country is through violence, because, they Are Wrong, and if they continue to pursue that course, they and many, many other people will end up being Wrong and DEAD!

And that is why I am suffering the heat, and struggling up the hills, and communicating wherever I can because I Get That! And I would hate to see any of my family, any of my old friends, or new friends, or their children, or their relatives or their friends Dead for No Good Reason! We made some progress with our Revolutionary War, but more progress was made towards the protection of human rights Non-Violently AFTER the war then were made because of it. And that is something else I have been reminded of by reading Paul K. Chappell's books. So, I ask again, that all of my readers and friends do the same.

Thank You!

June 8th, 2013 Weatherford to Granbury, Texas

I pulled away from my aunt and uncle's house around 9:30 am - a relatively good start. Based on my departure times last year, anything before 10:00 am is "early" for me! I suspect the Texas heat will inevitably force me to push that time back even more, and I Will adapt as necessary although it means getting much more efficient with my pack-out routine.

The first challenge on this first day back on my bike was the gravel road connecting Ann Brown Drive to Upper Denton Road. It wasn't too bad though as the county workers had been there over the past week packing it down to prepare for future paving (sorry I just missed that). It had been a bit frustrating to my aunt and uncle as they were driving their bright red trucks through the frequently soaked and muddy gravel, getting them dirtier day by day. I even held off leaving until the weekend, when the workers would be off duty, to avoid the mud myself.

Of course, I ran into some hills pretty quickly and was off the bike pushing, and keeping a close eye on the Saturday morning traffic as it cruised past in both directions on the mostly unmarked roads. What drivers in this situation do not realize is that I can actually hear them coming from some distance away, long before I actually see them. Furthermore, I can hear the cars coming from both directions even before they can see each other.

On one particularly difficult, curving hill, I was pulled over to the side because I was hearing a vehicle (or vehicles?) but could not tell from which direction. Then I realized there were two and they were converging right about where I was. As the one approached from behind me, at the lower part of the hill, I motioned with my left hand moving up and down to signal "Slow Down..." and instead the car sped up as it swerved and raced around me only to realize, just in time, that there was a car coming over the hill from the opposite direction. The passing car honked as they went by, and I'm not sure if it was meant to be annoyance or gratitude once they realized that I was only trying to help. So, as a note, for all you drivers out there, keep in mind, if you ever see a cyclist doing that, you know, standing on the road and moving their hand up and down vertically, like they are pressing air into the ground, it means "Slow Down" - that's all. Doesn't mean you have to change lanes to pass, or anything like that, but that a little more caution and a little less speed are in order.

At the top of one of those hills, I passed a house and car I had spotted before. Only this time, the owner, Jackie, was out mowing his lawn. We stopped and chatted for a bit about my trip and then he agreed to let me take his picture.

Of course, the car caught my attention because it looked so much like my old VW Bug, and, as it turned out, it was a '72 model where mine was a '73. Furthermore, according to Jackie, it was still running, which is always good to hear.

I pushed on, sometimes on the bike, and sometimes off, until I got into the congestion of downtown Weatherford. Unfortunately, that included A Lot of construction right on the main road I needed to transit. I tried to avoid as much as I could, but there was a stretch of about a quarter mile that was between me and "freedom". With two lanes of two-way traffic squished to the left side of the road, and a concrete barrier to the right, all of that on yet another hill rising up from the intersection I had come to, there was no way I was going to get up it from there, certainly not walking/pushing my bicycle without causing some major frustration to the traffic behind me.

So instead, I crossed over into the Wal-Mart parking lot, got held up in more traffic, had to dismount my bicycle, feeling somewhat self-conscious with all of the shoppers around, and managed to nudge that troublesome left knee joint of mine out of the socket again, not severely mind you, but had to hyper-extend my leg as I have learned to do to pop it back into place. Then I continued to walk my bicycle past the entrance to the store and towards the far side of the parking lot where I stood on the sidewalk for some time trying to assess my options.

I watched as cars came up and down the nearby road, some of them seeming to come from the construction blocked area I was trying to get to. I concluded there had to be some other route around the businesses' parking lots in that area. So, continuing to walk/push my bicycle mostly against the traffic, and up hill, and then crossing into a very steep parking-lot entrance, I made my way around the front to the access road paralleling the main road, only to be faced with yet another Really Steep (but thankfully short) grade, taking me into another parking area. After catching my breath for a minute, and drinking some more fluids, I dug in and pushed, tippy-toed up the drive, praying to be seen by any oncoming traffic (which was there but, thankfully, managed to avoid me).

Once at this upper parking-lot I was level with the main road again, and could see the narrow gravel path that led back out to it through the construction. Beyond that, and heading south, I had about 20 yards of the two-way traffic, in two lanes, with the concrete barrier to the right, before reaching the lighted intersection. Watching the traffic, the light, and the construction worker watching me, I made my way out, still walking until I was finally able to position myself to cross the rather broad intersection once the light changed.

I pulled way over into the shoulder on the right side as soon as I got through, and maybe went another half-a-mile down the road before I found a gravel road that led to some shade trees where I could park my bicycle, recover for a few minutes, and call my aunt and uncle to let them know I had managed to navigate through the construction. The six miles from their house through town to where I was had taken Three Hours! And there were still more hills to come!

Nevertheless, I was finally On My Way, and relieved to be out of downtown Weatherford! I wish I'd been able to take more pictures, but my main focus was just getting past all of that!

The rest of my journey was relatively uneventful. A lot of it looked like this...

I made a few pit-stops along the way, one at the Springcreek V.F.D. where Barry graciously let me use the bathroom and re-fill my water bottles. I also made a similar pit-stop at Panchitos Mexican Restaurant, just north of Granbury, where three of my bottles were filled with ice water by one of the waitresses there. In addition to these stops, however, given that I now had the capability to prop my bicycle on the side of the road (at least in the more level areas), I was actually able to "go" where I might not have been able to "go" before, especially with a "privacy shield" provided by my green, multi-purpose, nylon cover wrapped around my waist!

(As a side note: I learned about this kind of "privacy shielding" hanging out with the Artemis Racing Team in Maryland. Almost all the women carried either a long skirt or suitably sized towel with them as they were frequently changing into or out of their riding shorts in parking-lots next to the race courses.)

Once again, having that option of safely propping my rig upright on the side of the road was proving to be Very Helpful!

Granted, I would still take advantage of a barrier here and there, like the one provided at my first major water crossing for this part of my trek, at Lake Granbury.

But it is always good to have multiple options!

The sun was getting low as I finally made my way into the town of Granbury proper...

And there were still more hills...

On the road just before my final turn-off these "Three Amigos" came galloping to the fence, curious as ever and ready to pose for their picture...

As I turned onto the street for my host's address, sure enough, there was One More Hill to climb...

And then I was "done" for the day!

My host Susan graciously welcomed me to her home and heavily shaded back patio where we settled in for some great conversations over the next couple of days.

With her husband, Terry, out of town, I had the Guest House (which also served as his "home office") to myself...

...but also filled-in as "Cook" (normally Terry's role), by preparing my "Special Egg Fried Rice" recipe for dinner the second night I was there, using the bean sprouts that I had started soaking the night before in Weatherford, and which, given the nearly perfect conditions of warmth and darkness in the pockets of my panniers, were already ready to eat.

I want to offer a special Thanks to Susan and Terry, for opening up their home and guest house/office to me, and to other cycling travelers via WarmShowers.org. Really sorry I did not get to meet Terry, as I heard great things about him from Susan. I had a wonderful time talking with Susan, telling her about the mission of the Nuclear Age Peace Foundation and all about Paul K. Chappell and his work as their Peace Leadership Director and of course his writing work to help educate people in how to more effectively "Wage Peace." We also talked a lot about the challenges of family relations and raising children. I must say, I have a lot of respect for how Susan and Terry have been living their lives together and for their Conscious Parenting! I wish them all continued Success and Happiness and I look forward to keeping in touch.

After a couple of days "recovering", enjoying good food, conversation, and accommodation, it was once again time to head on down the road, to my second stop for this trip at the more southern end of hot and hilly, Granbury, Texas...

Better Yet...Let's Head Back to Florida! : )

It is so funny sometimes...what happens...and how that leads to other changes in emotion, psychology, motivation...and then a whole new realm of possibilities opens up before you! : )

In considering my trip to Missoula, MT I realized I was ready to start selling off the rest of my personal belongings - the things I left back in Florida before I headed out on my bicycle trip, including some of the more expensive items, like my Bernina Serger and my Vitamix.

In an e-mail to Paul Chappell I wrote "At the very least, I would really like you to meet my friends Jody and Roy who live in Missoula and were like a second set of adoptive parents while I lived there." And, as much as I would also like to see them myself, in writing that message I became "okay" with accepting the "very least" of that range of possibilities; i.e. Paul getting to meet them, even if I cannot make the trip. As I imagined using $500 for that, I realized there really are other things I need to be focusing on for whatever funds I can raise right now.

Finally, although I thought I had another couch-surfing host lined-up with more need for my help in selling their stuff as well, they decided it was not quite the right time in their life to do that. Nevertheless, with a little more planning and marketing on my part, I think I can turn that into a business/service by the time I get back here.

And, that leads to my next point: One thing has become perfectly clear to me while being here in Santa Barbara: This is definitely where I WANT TO BE! It's got its challenges, the cost of living being one of those, but it has a lot of opportunities as well. Furthermore, I wholeheartedly want to be able to continue working with Paul and eventually writing my own book(s?). For now though, there are some loose ends to tie up, so I need to be figuring out how I am going to go about doing that.

To start, I need to finish reducing down everything else I have in my storage unit in Florida. My goal is to be able to fit everything left into a vehicle that I can then drive across the country. I can approach that adventure much the same way I approached my bicycle trip, except this time, I can plan to line-up more speaking engagements along the way, hopefully to larger groups. Since I will be driving, that can make it much easier and safer for me to get from one location to another.

Of course, I'll be "Couch Surfing" again, maybe in different parts of the country this time. I have other friends and family through the middle states, so might be a good time to visit all of them.

As with the bicycle trip, it will be hard to tell exactly how the dates are going to work out, the storage unit in Florida has to be dealt with first and foremost, for all kinds of practical reasons. But I do know there is another NAPF Peace Leadership Workshop to come in the summer of 2013 and I Plan to Be There...again, this time also working as a facilitator.

"So, Universe...How's that sound? Am I on the right track here? : ) You know how to let me know! : ))"

I can feel myself getting all excited again! : ))

If this sounds like a good plan to YOU, then I welcome your support. I am still going to need a little money to live on here, but a plane ticket from LAX to JAX on Southwest, including the bus to LA is going to run around $290-$300. Once I get back to Jacksonville, I can start selling off whatever I have left...but a big part of that will be to raise money for a drivable vehicle, and my first few weeks of expenses.

So, any help you can offer now, would be greatly appreciated! We'll see if we can get this show back on the road! : )

Yours for Peace!

September 21, 2012 - Update

Southwest has a sale going on right now and I can get a ticket to fly out within the next month or so for $175. That plus the bus ride to Los Angeles from Santa Barbara is a total of $225, but I have to act within the next week and I have to purchase the ticket via PayPal as I do not have an active credit/debit card or bank account anymore. I have raised $90 towards that goal, so still need to raise $135.

Thanks for your support! : )

NAPF Workshop, Part II - Nuclear Sleeping Pills

On the first full day of the workshop, president of the The Nuclear Age Peace Foundation, David Krieger came to speak to us. He is a very gentle and soft-spoken man, but with a strength of will and character that has served him well ever since he first refused to participate in the war in Vietnam. Although the odds were stacked against him, much as they are now, he won that struggle and I would like to think he's going to win this struggle to rid the world of nuclear weapons as well.

Although I cannot remember everything he said, what I do know is that he helped me to understand that at its core, Nuclear Deterrence theory holds No Regard for Life, whatsoever. I have concluded that the very fact that nuclear weapons exist in our world is really a testament to our general desperation and frustration with our inability to "all get along" on this planet we call "Home".

As I have now had the chance to consider this further, I feel there is something I can share from my personal experience, that might help make sense of why we still have nuclear weapons scattered all over the world.

To preface this rather personal sharing, I will acknowledge that I am making myself vulnerable here. Even though the events described below took place over 20 years ago for me, they are going to be "new and present" for my readers, and may influence opinions of me in the present as well. Though I can control what I write, I cannot control people's responses, and, since I'm pretty certain I will be writing more about my life story in the future, I have decided to just go ahead and get this part of it "out there".

I will also add though, as difficult as the experience was for me, there were many, many pivotal insights that I gained as a consequence, some I will elaborate on in near future blogs. Furthermore, I was able to process the whole experience very thoroughly shortly afterwards by having the opportunity, along with about 15-20 other women, to read Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. The fact that the experience was so "fresh" for me made Este's teachings on "recognizing predators" and making the transition from "naive innocent" to "wise innocent" (among many other things) that much more relevant and profoundly life changing for me.

Finally, as I learned from going through the workshop, and watching another attendee come forward and share authentically from his own depths parts of himself that he had otherwise kept hidden from others, I have come to appreciate that when one person does that it can often give others the courage and even the very "method" for doing the same. Hopefully, in my sharing this somewhat darker experience of my life, others will find the courage to be more open as well, if they need to. As I am fond of saying: It's good to "keep all the balls on the water" (and I'll explain more about that, in a future blog : )).

* * * * * * * *

When I was in my mid twenties, I started my first job in sewing manufacturing with a company in Montana.  I was initially assigned to work a "box-tacker" machine, and with Zen and the Art of Motor Cycle Maintenance under my belt, I developed a relationship with that machine and managed to keep it running better than anyone else in the plant ever had.

Not sure if that was the only reason, but I soon drew the attention of the owner of the company and he would come to talk with me off and on as I worked. Within a relatively short time, maybe as little as two or three weeks, he asked me if I would be interested in taking over the management position as the manager at the time was getting ready to resign due to "health problems".

Even though I had absolutely no experience in management, I accepted his offer. I had just been through a "revolution" in my approach to diet, which had raised my energy levels considerably above my previous "normal", so, as I told him: "I might not know anything about management, but I [did] know how to eat right!" The rest...I would just have to figure out as I went along.

Once I became manager, of necessity, the owner and I ended up spending more and more time together, reviewing product designs and production schedules. He had a childish awe of my creative sewing skills and I really felt I could do whatever he asked me to, in part because he had so much faith in me. As time went on, I found myself more and more attracted to him and, in spite of the fact that he was married, I let myself "fall in love with him".

As he later let me know, at least the attraction part was mutual, and on more than one occasion over the next several weeks and months, we were intimate with one another.

Looking back now, I can see how "dysfunctional" the whole relationship really was. But, at the time, I was still quite naive in spite of my age. It had really not been all that long since my mother had gone into the mental hospital. I was still "recovering" from the many years of social isolation her paranoia had imposed on both of us. More importantly though, I was still vulnerable to "predators" because of my still very deep needs for love and appreciation, especially from men.

A few weeks into our "affair", we hired a new employee, a woman even younger than myself.  She was also quite bright and a capable sewer.  What's more, though, she was very Observant, and began to pick-up on the "signs" that neither the owner nor I were discreet enough to hide.  Again, in my naiveté, I did not see what she was up to until it was too late. Before long, I started to become "old news" to my employer. He started giving less and less of his attention to me, even with respect to work issues, and more and more to her.

I was still "in love" with him though, and bent on "loving no matter what", so I began channeling all of that energy into my work, putting in more and more hours as the weeks went by. It did not cost him any more because I was on a salary, but it definitely ended up costing me.

Consequently, it wasn't very long before I started to burn out, both emotionally and physically. After a trip to Atlanta, Georgia for the "Bobbin Show"- the annual sewing manufacturer's convention, where I worked hard every day to network and establish new contacts with various suppliers - I came back hoping to take a few days off to "recover".  However, as far as my employer was concerned, my trip to the "Bobbin Show" had been a vacation for me, and so he couldn't understand why I would want or need to take any additional time off. In other words, whether it was a conscious choice on his part or not, he was not listening to me, let alone hearing me.

With mounting exhaustion and feelings of helplessness, I realized the only way I was going to get any time off was to quit, but I really did not want to do that, because I really liked the job, and I needed the job to support myself. As had been the case, and would continue to be the case for many years ahead, I did not have any "back-up" - no one else I could rely on for practical support - except myself.

So, I pushed on until, one day, in the break room, one of the other employees let me know that the new girl was out to get my position and "talking to the owner behind my back", as well as causing or suggesting  problems that she was blaming on me. It seemed they were both just waiting for me to quit.

I had a dream then. One in which I became lucid. I was being chased by a rabid beaver-like creature, on an island, out in the middle of a lake. When I realized I was dreaming, I intentionally leaped with great flying strides to the mainland, thus escaping harm.

Waking with a renewed sense of will and determination, I went to work the next day with a specially designed name-tag that read "Rocki Bellboa" - and, sure enough, when the new girl saw it, she asked me what it meant, and I told her, "It means I'm just going to keep coming back, and keep coming back, and keep coming back."  She immediately rushed to the owner's office.

Shortly thereafter, I was called there myself. The employer said that before I left he wanted me to train the new girl in my position. I was puzzled, as I had only asked, at one point, how much notice he wanted me to give him IF I decided to quit. But I had not decided to do that. He then told me if I were not going to quit, then I was "Fired"...but he still wanted me to train the new girl before I left.

I couldn't get my mind around what had happened. In something of a stupor, I carried out his request, finished my time there, and then proceeded to file for unemployment. But, I found myself spiraling rapidly into one of the deepest depressive episodes of my life. I was not only hurt emotionally, but I had lost my job, a job that was not only a source of income, but a source of great satisfaction for me because of all the creative ways I was able to express my sewing and even my innate management skills.

I felt really, really, hopeless, and helpless, and that's when I began contemplating suicide.

To that end, I eventually went to the store and bought some sleeping pills.

Once back home, I lay alone on my futon pallet bed, just wishing I could stop breathing.

It was in that state of mind and emotion that I heard a "voice in my head", and this is what it said:

"Okay, so you were able to buy the sleeping pills and nobody stopped you." I mentally agreed. "You could probably go back and buy  more if you really wanted to and no one would stop you then either." Again I agreed. "So now you know that you can take your life if you want to and, should things ever get this bad again, or worse, you can end your life any time in the future as well." Another mental nod from me. "But..." the voice continued, "...aren't you just a little bit curious to see how the rest of your life turns out?"

And, with a few moments consideration, to that question, I replied "Yes."

I carried that bottle of sleeping pills with me all the way to Santa Barbara, CA. I kept it as a reminder that my life truly was in my own hands, and I could end it any time I wanted to.  As I have explained in my recent "Why Bother?" blog, I think I have a better understanding of what the Real Consequences of ending my life might be, especially if I end it in the midst of really negative "patterning", so, for the record, I'm not inclined to be doing that. However, that does not change the fact that, in effect, I really could still "check out" any time.

And now I am beginning to think that our stockpiles of nuclear weapons are very much the same kind of "sleeping pills" for all of humanity.     

In much the same way I was struggling with my relationship with my employer, on the whole, we continue to struggle with our relationships with just about everyone, interpersonally, and globally.  Even for the people who are making headway on a small scale, the much greater issues, the truly Global Issues, seem pretty overwhelming, and many feel "helpless" and "hopeless", with no "back-up", just like I did.

Furthermore, we know now, that if it gets really bad, if diplomacy fails, if a couple of psychopathic leaders just go berserk with rage and frustration, or if only a few truly suicidal people (i.e. terrorists) ever get their hands on a nuclear weapon, then they can, in effect, pass out Big Giant Sleeping Pills to humankind, and put us all out of our misery, along with themselves, and the rest of life on this planet!

It begs the question: Why are we All Going Along With This?!?!

Why are we all (or, at least, most of us) so complacent about the fact that Our Lives and the Lives of Everything on this Planet are being effectively controlled, held in the balance, by only a handful of people? That those human beings who are in power are really not that different from the rest of us, except they are even MORE likely to be psychopaths and, therefore, even LESS Capable of caring at all about how much harm they may cause to others, both human and non-human.

Given the stockpiles of  "Nuclear Sleeping Pills" already hidden in "medicine cabinets" all over the world (and, to be honest, this includes nuclear power facilities as well), is there any good reason why we, why Anyone, should be acquiring More?!  Is there a chance, just maybe, that we can find other, less inherently Suicidal ways to satisfy our needs for security (and energy)? Can we find better ideas, more Life Respecting ideas around which we can orient our international foreign policies besides "Nuclear Deterrence" and "The Balance of Power"?

Is anyone just a little bit curious to see what the future might hold for humanity, if we can just get past this "rough patch"?

As for me...I've decided to stick around and see. Thanks to Paul K. Chappell's inspiration among other things, I have finally gotten rid of that bottle of sleeping pills. I have decided to continue to face my own personal challenges, and to grow through those, to become more and more capable of "Waging Peace" in All of my relationships by Being Peace-Full and by Communicating Peace - Fully.

Furthermore, wherever possible, I am going to continue to bring attention to What is Really at Stake in this world, as long as we do not recognize the irrational, paranoid, and basically un-empathetic nature of so many of those in power. These leaders do Not represent "Us". They do not represent the character of Most human beings to be empathetic and cooperative. As psychopaths, they are the "6%ers" at best, and the sooner we realize that, the more effective we can be at shifting the current "security paradigm". Moreover, we can Stop Giving Them the "keys" to all of the "medicine cabinets" all over the world holding all of our "Nuclear Sleeping Pills".

For now, I have Paul K. Chappell and the Nuclear Age Peace Foundation to thank for giving me more tools to help me in that struggle, and for giving me the motivation to share what I have learned with others, here, and as I continue my bike trek across the country.

To that end, I am going to stay Hope Full AND Curious...and I Hope You Will, Too! : ))